I tap the snooze button every morning. No, worse. Jefe taps the snooze button for me every morning. He is already out of bed, coffee made, hitting that snooze button every 9 minutes until I manage to get on my feet. Every evening I choose the time that I set the alarm, usually somewhere in the middle of the 6 o’clock hour. I impress myself if I’m out of bed before 7:25.
When I set the alarm each morning, I have aspirations of greeting the morning, sitting with my breath for a few minutes, moving my body with some yoga, writing in my journal while enjoying a cup of coffee, and performing all of the self-care rituals that I should include in my daily routine. Instead I usually lay in bed, half awake and half asleep, setting myself up to scarf my breakfast and squeeze into work just as I need to be there.
This pattern is having detrimental effects on more than just my morning yoga practice. I strive to be a trustworthy person; someone who my friends can count on and who can be held accountable. Every time I tell myself I’m going to do something and don’t follow through, I chip away at my own integrity and my trust in myself. On the flip side, every time that I do follow through I build that trust. I trust myself to get out of bed a little earlier, I trust myself to do what I need to do in order to build my endurance on the mountain bike, I trust myself to take care of myself and make healthy choices. I can do whatever it is I tell myself I want to do! It’s like my own word to myself had lost meaning, so I didn’t take myself seriously. I didn’t trust myself.
Flexibility is super important to me. If I say I’m going to ride for three hours, and a friend calls to invite me out for a hike, I very well may choose friend time over saddle time. Things comes up, I fall under the weather, plans change for any number of reasons, but mindless ignoring of commitments to myself has come to a halt! If I say I’m going to do something, I want to trust myself to follow through and do it; to take myself seriously. So maybe I’ll say “I’m getting out of bed at 6:00 tomorrow morning” less frequently, but when I say it, I mean it! I am building trust in myself, proving to myself that I have the integrity it takes to follow through with commitments, especially to myself.